Twenty-three years ago a white supremacist shot Rais Bhuyian at point blank range in the face. It was ten days after 9/11 and he was working at a convenience store when Mark Stroman went on a vengeful shooting spree targeting what he perceived as Middle Eastern people. Miraculously, Bhuyian survived. Surprisingly, Bhuyian forgave him.

Bhuyian is one of hundreds of people who became victims of hate crimes in America  immediately following the terrorist attacks that brought down the World Trade Center. According to a 2002 report by Human Rights Watch, more than 2,000 backlash incidents related to 9/11 were reported by Arab people, Muslims, and people perceived to be Arab and Muslim. The report also found that the Federal Bureau of Investigations saw a seven-fold increase of anti-Arab crimes across the country. After the shotgun shell blast showered Bhuyian’s face with pellets, he played dead until the shooter left. Covered in blood, Bhuyain ran out to the barber shop next door. He still remembers his unrecognizable face in the mirror looking back at him while he pleaded for help. In the ambulance, on his way to the hospital, he cried out for his mother and begged God to save him, promising he would only do good if he lived to see another day. Waqar Hasan and Vasudev Patel, two other victims of Stroman, were not so lucky.

Stroman was eventually put on death row. And who was his biggest champion before he faced lethal injection? Bhuiyan. After attending Mecca in 2009, he fought to appeal Stroman’s death sentence in federal court. He lost the appeal and Stroman was executed on July 20, 2011. In the end Stroman called Bhuiyan his brother and told him he loved him. Among his last words were, “One second of hate will cause a lifetime of pain.”

Despite losing vision in one eye, facing extraordinary physical and mental trauma, and dealing with thousands of dollars of debt, today Bhuiyan emits positivity and optimism. He dedicates his life to World Without Hate, the nonprofit he founded, and is part of Humanities Washington’s Speakers Bureau, giving a talk called “One Second of Hate: A Story of Forgiveness.” He travels both the state and the country sharing his story of tragedy, forgiveness, and redemption. He especially enjoys speaking in small towns, the kind you find in rural America. “People are so open and welcoming,” he says. “There is fear, of course, but when they come and join this event after a few minutes they feel comfortable. It’s not about talking down to them or giving them a lecture. The way I do things, I do things with them, not to them, so that people feel they’re part of this conversation.”

Humanities Washington spoke to Rais about his journey to forgive his would-be killer. This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

You’d been in the US for two years when Mark Stroman shot you. Was this your first experience with hate in the U.S.?

Before 9/11, I don’t remember facing any kind of racism or hateful experience. I loved the country very much. I came here to study, so I was in a learning mood. I left my career in the Bangladesh Air Force to come to the U.S. to study computer science. Everything was new to me. Culture, people, environment.

Before you immigrated did you imagine that maybe you’d be a victim of hate?

Never in a million years. America was my dream country. Growing up in Bangladesh, watching Hollywood movies and TV shows, I was captivated by what I saw. The natural beauty, the seemingly endless opportunity, the generosity of American people. The United States is known for offering the best higher education in the world. And it’s a country where anyone can prosper. And still I have the same view about America. This is a beacon of hope. This is still the greatest country on the face of the earth.

Walk me through your day leading up to that moment that changed your life forever.

Business was slow. The gas station itself was located in a neighborhood where I saw the plight of poverty, racism, discrimination, drug abuse, and gun violence. It was something that I did not watch in the movies or TV shows I remember watching as a child. Around noon a man walked in wearing a bandana, sunglasses, and a baseball cap, and he was holding something shiny and black on his waist. Having been robbed before in the same gas station, I thought it would be another robbery. As soon as he walked in, I offered him the money. But he had no desire to look at the money. He was looking at me straight. I felt cold air flow through my spine. I was freaking out at the time. “Why is he not looking at the money? Why is he not taking it? Why is he not taking the money and just leaving?”

Then what happened?

He bumbled a question: “Where are you from?” In a fraction of a second I realized: He’s here for me. And then in a fearful voice, I said, “Excuse me?” As soon as I said that he pulled the trigger from point blank range. There was no argument, there was no confrontation, there was nothing. I felt a million bees stinging my face and then I heard the explosion. I looked down, saw blood pouring like an open faucet from the right side of my head. My military training instinct kicked in: I need to reduce myself so that I’m no longer a big target for him to shoot more. So I fell to the floor. And I remember the gun touching, pointing straight at my face. Since I was not moving, lying on my own full of blood, he finally left after a few seconds. I stood up and grabbed the phone, but I was shaking so badly I could not even dial 911.

When did you realize you survived?

When I woke up, I didn’t know where I was. I could not talk because my jaw was completely stuck. I thought I’d actually died. So very slowly, I said, “Where am I?” And after a few seconds I heard, “Good morning Mr. Bhuiyan, you’re in the hospital.” It was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. My eyes were full of tears, not from the pain, but from the joy of still being alive. Knowing that I’ll be able to go back to my mom, my family, my loved ones, my friends. I’ll be able to enjoy life again. That pleasure is so powerful, so heavenly. It’s impossible to express with human words. But the joy did not last long. The hospital was private and expensive and I had no health insurance at the time. They discharged me the next morning and told me to arrange follow-up medical treatments on my own.

What was your recovery like?

I went to several surgeries, one after the other. The last surgery I had was 2004. But my medical treatment continued up to 2007. After the fourth surgery, the doctor told me that there is no way they can save my vision. So I lost my vision in one eye. I still carry more than three dozen pellets. I lost a tooth. I lost my fiancé. My medical bills were piling up. It went up to more than $60,000. It took several years to finally end my medical treatments, but the toll was very high mentally, physically, psychologically, not knowing where the money would come from to cover the medical expenses. It was another trauma I was going through every single day.

What about your family? Where were they and how did they find out?

When I was in the hospital, somebody called my family and told my dad. There was no follow-up, so my family thought I was no longer there. That caused another trauma, another disaster back home, and as a result, my father suffered a stroke. Thankfully, he survived. On the fourth or fifth day I called. It was a very emotional and painful phone call. I didn’t want any of my family members to come be a part of this pain and misery. Rather, I wanted to face it, to get it over with, and then when things felt in a better way maybe I’d have them come.

It’s not about letting him go free; it was all about saving a life. By killing this person, by taking his life, we will not get back our loved ones.

What about Mark? What did you think or feel toward him?

I never hated him. I was never angry at him. I was angry about the whole situation, where this happened because I came here to do something bigger and better. And then now this thing. But when you learn more about this incident, why he did it, it helped me not to hate him. In the course of time, it helped me to see him as a human being, someone like me and also as a victim, but that took time. He didn’t realize what he was doing, doing evil to respond to evil.

How do you forgive someone who wanted to kill you?

Our life is the most precious commodity. So when I got my life back I wanted to move forward. I wanted to rebuild my life. If I stay angry, if I stay sad, depressed, if I stay revengeful, it would be hard for me to move forward and stay sane every single day. When I went to Mecca in 2009 I was praying every single day and reflecting on the shooting incident. I realized that I had forgiven my attacker many years ago, but I feel like that was not enough. Even after I forgave him, he was going to be executed. I made a promise to God that I would help. Maybe he should be the first person that needs my help. And I needed to do something to save his life. By killing him we would lose a human life without getting to the root cause.

You tried to save this man from death row. What did the families of the other victims think?

After I went to Mecca, I reached out to both families. This terrible incident brought us together, but now both the widows see me as their brother. I reached out to them and I explained my intention. It’s not about letting him go free; it was all about saving a life. By killing this person, by taking his life, we will not get back our loved ones. The pain and suffering we went through will not be erased from our life, but by keeping this person alive behind bars, he might be able to get a chance, finally, to repair himself. By being repaired, he might be able to contribute to the free world, reaching out to people like him and saying, “Look, this is what I did and I’m paying for my mistakes, so learn from my mistakes.” If he could touch one life, if he could help one person to change, to reform, that’s a positive outcome. But by killing him, we will not get anything. I did not push [the other victims’ families] and I was extremely respectful to their emotions, to their thoughts and ideas. It took time. After one week, both families came. I had their blessings. And one of the families came forward and joined my campaign.

You’ve made it your mission to combat hate, but especially with what the political situation has looked like since 2016, do you think hate has gotten worse or better since 9/11?

Hate in America has gotten worse in some places, in some places it has improved. From my journey and from meeting people through speaking engagements, people are afraid. People are going through challenges in their own lives, struggling financially, physically, mentally, psychologically. On top of that, there is a lot of fear in our society. There’s a lot of misunderstanding and misinformation. Some of that is spread purposefully by some of our public officials, some of our elected leaders, to advance their career. They don’t think about how by spreading this fear, these lies, and this misinformation, they’re destroying the lives of all those people. Nobody wants to stay in fear. It doesn’t matter who the person is. People want to lead a peaceful life, but sometimes they don’t have the capacity. They don’t have the means to get beyond their neighborhood, their community. People want to learn and grow. We need more two-way dialogue. We need to listen to each other respectfully. Even if we disagree, we have to come to this point that even though I disagree, I agree to disagree, and I will listen to you respectfully. Because it might lead to an unlikely source of wisdom.

Do you think it’s possible to live in a world without hate?

Absolutely.